Blacklisted Clients: The Kyle Bernis Files

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facts you need to know: Pumpkin Delights

FACT #1
It’s that time of year, Pumpkin Delights are once again available at finer grocery and department stores! (picture below)

FACT #2
My dick was in that actual box of Pumpkin Delights because I originally had a slightly more “creative” pose in mind.

FACT #3
If anyone owns any x-ray glasses, put ’em on and then look at the above picture again. Yep, that’s a wadded up jizz rag hiding in the box!! Gross huh?

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Tony Catches Eric Masturbating at Work

Considering that they’ve been friends since 7th grade and have a life-long business partnership, it’s only natural to assume that it would happen someday…and today, January 31st, 2001, was that day.

Eric, reportedly bored out of his mind by the absence of his friend (Tony, who had the day off), releaved himself of grill duties by asking for a “poop break”. He had been putting company spending to good use for over 10 minutes when Tony stopped by to pay him a surprise visit. A thunderous kick to the stall door ultimately broke his concentration, and forced the session to end prematurely.

According to eye wittnesses in the dining room area and a source close to the two, Eric vehemently denied accusations that he was jerking off–until a teary confession was left on Tony’s answering machine hours later.