A New Low (Tenth Anniversary Edition) – AVAILABLE NOW!

A New Low Tenth Anniversary Edition

To celebrate the ten year anniversary of A New Low, I’ve whipped up a brand new digital-only extended cut, aptly titled A New Low (Tenth Anniversary Edition), it includes the movie, bonus stuff from the original DVD release, plus never-before-seen deleted material; bumping the overall runtime up to an hour n’ two minutes (from its original 36 minutes)!

A New Low (Tenth Anniversary Edition) is available to download right here for only $1.99!

PS: For the inevitable inquiries or wisecracks about owning a copy of A New Low 2 before its upcoming ten year anniversary: since the decision not to put it out on DVD, we’ve struggled for a very long time to find a proper outlet for it…so, if the digital release of A New Low (Tenth Anniversary Edition) proves desirable, we’ll have a downloadable version of A New Low 2 in your hands by Halloween of this year.

In other words, if you want a copy of A New Low 2, quit shakin’ your fist at me—and start shakin’ your credit card in this direction. Capeesh?


A New Low premiered at The Haunt in Ithaca, NY ten years ago today. Millions gathered at Thorne Street Park in Horseheads to observe the anniversary and join in prayer. The decennial celebration culminated with a massive fireworks show honoring the cast and crew, who were on hand and charging only $25 per autograph. Happy anniversary, fellas! Here’s to the next ten years of A NEW LOW!

A New Low classic logo shirts are back!

Our original shirts are back to commemorate the ten year anniversary of A New Low. Snatch ’em up before they go back into moratorium for another goddamn decade!


Shirts are just $22 and are available in men’s and women’s sizes with a wide array of color choices. Printed on American Apparel Fine Jersey T-shirts, made with 100% fine jersey cotton, combed for softness and comfort.

“Yetti vs Taem” shirts now available!


The warmth of a friend’s vomit brings joy to our hearts, sunlight to our souls, bile to our crotches, and pleasure to all of life.

This is another fine piece by Alexander Duke (wizardskull.com), inspired by one of the most horrific prank videos in the history of mankind and one of our proudest moments here at A New Low, Yetti vs Taem.

Shirts are just $22 and are available in men’s and women’s sizes with a wide array of color choices. Printed on American Apparel Fine Jersey T-shirts, made with 100% fine jersey cotton, combed for softness and comfort.

This video doesn’t exist

Current Mysteries: Season 2, Episode 2 “Headhunters”

Season 2 is upon us. Sorry for the delay, folks…the United States government is doing everything they can to put a muzzle on Current Mysteries. It’s making our production difficult…but we will persevere. Why? Because the truth is out there…and they can’t keep it covered forever.

Now, brace yourself for the episode they didn’t want you to see…


-John Holden

Current Mysteries: Season 2, Episode 1 “Masked Phantoms”

School is almost over, so shut your history book and take a mystery look…

I mean there is something new, or preferably current.

The long awaited second season of Current Mysteries is finally here.

For your viewing pleasure and safety, I bring you “Masked Phantoms.”

Unearthed Merch: ‘A New Low’ Girly Tank Top

While diggin’ through storage in hopes of locating my notebooks of Ricky Martin fan-fiction, I uncovered some rare A New Low gems that I’ll be adding to the site over the coming weeks.

The first is a girly tank top (black, 100% pre-shrunk cotton) proudly displaying the A New Low logo in white print. Morrissey once observed that some girls are bigger than others…and I’m observing that some girls are also shit outta luck, because all we have left is SMALL. (Fret not, our large-breasted and otherwise curvy cohorts…we’ll design a new shirt with a full run of sizes in the near future.)

These were thought to be long out of stock since maybe 2006 and there’s only a short stack of ’em left…so get off your snatch n’ snatch one up before they’re gone forever!

We even have two options for ya. Just click on the one you want n’ get whisked away to our delightful, easy to use checkout page.

1) Just the shirt, as described above, for $15.

2) The shirt, as described above, plus both of our DVDs and two adorable stickers, for $25.

Choose or lose, buckaroos!

Diaper-Rash of the Titans: Tom Green’s Endorsement of A New Low

Sure, we’re a little late on this…but a big thanks to Tom Green for the shout-out he gave A New Low on his Prepare For Impact DVD a while back.

Tom, let’s listen to rap music and go skateboarding sometime soon.

Everyone else, lace up your fanny packs, grab a fistful of lukewarm cottage cheese n’ head on over to www.tomgreen.com!

Major Label De Pew


You know you’ve made it when the art you’ve passionately poured your heart and soul into is given away with toilet products. That same goal has driven A New Low for years. Thank you, Jo Dee Messina, for paving the way…

Son of a Bitch: Part II premiere / Bella Morte

Photos by Ryan Gee

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